Thursday 31 October 2019

Blogtober Day Twenty Three
Hey lovelies!

Happy Halloween!! Now that Blogtober has drawn to a close and all the posts have successfully gone live, I think that it is high time I did a bit of reflecting!

My favourite memory from Blogtober has got to be the weekend that has just gone. My family, my boyfriend and I spent both Saturday and Sunday indulging in all things Halloween and that most certainly included carving my very FIRST pumpkin (mine is the witch)!

I adored being creative and also having the chance to have a mini shopping spree beforehand to find little bits and bobs that would make the whole weekend just that much better. The little sign, the sweets, the pumpkins, the Halloween headbands and the carving tools worked a treat! I even got my boyfriend to do my makeup on the Sunday (the result of which can be found on my Instagram haha) and it was all-in-all such a lovely, sweet success!

If you would like some spooky photos, feel free to peruse the photos that I have included down below and let's all say goodbye to Blogtober 2019! Be sure to leave me a comment letting me know if you enjoyed my content this time around. What was your favourite post and would you like to see me participate in Blogtober again? I want to know!


Wednesday 30 October 2019

Blogtober Day Twenty Two
Hey lovelies!

Turns out I love myself a good beauty box! This sudden love came about when I was a scrolling through the Beauty section on the Boots website and found this fabulous deal where you could receive the above Beauty Edit Box had you spent £25 on selected beauty products. 

When I saw this deal and the fact that I could get a variety of products worth £40 for free, especially ones that are either new or highly recommended, you bet that I jumped at the chance! I'll tell you from now that there is nothing worse than buying a product with your own money and it ending up being a complete waste of time...

Fortunately for me, I didn't have to go through that pain but instead I chose the products that I needed and took delight in paying for them knowing that I was going to receive over double of what I had originally ordered - I was LOVING life at this stage hahaha!

The contents of the box, which you will see down below, had products that were for the most part very new to me. I really believe that opportunities or deals like these can reduce so much heartache and disappointment because you can fully enjoy and test out a product before purchasing it yourself.

Having tried some of these products over the last few weeks, I am glad to announce that I am very happy with everything that has been included. I have even added a separate section in my beauty drawer just for new products to make sure that I get round to using each and every item - such a chore right? (NOT)

Let me know if you love beauty boxes like these! Are you signed up on any beauty box subscription services? If so, which ones?


Tuesday 29 October 2019

Blogtober Day Twenty One

Hey lovelies!

With a sister like mine, I won't ever need anything else for Halloween. She is so talented and so beyond creative it's genuinely crazy! I love her to bits and I can't help but be in awe of both her skills and her ability to pick something up within a matter of seconds.

I've found that whether it's a look on me, herself or somebody else, she always takes SO MUCH pride in getting every detail right. She can take inspiration from something and immediately make it her own and personally, although I may be a little biased, it definitely turns out way better than the original.

Now I know that this may be a shorter post but I think that the photos and Elena's makeup artistry speak for themselves. I felt this appreciation for my sister/Halloween looks post was both necessary and super effective - afterall don't you want to look like a Halloween bride too?! Because same.

Side-note: If you're looking for someone to do your makeup for Halloween or any occasion for that matter, Elena Pylarinos MUA is always taking bookings so get in contact ASAP!

Let me know in the comment section down below which Halloween look is your favourite! Also, what will you be on 31 October? I want to know!


Elena Pylarinos MUA Socials

Monday 28 October 2019

Blogtober Day Twenty
Hey lovelies!

So I found somewhere new today. I decided to go outside on my lunch break and just take a walk and it so happens that I found somewhere I haven't been before - Russell Square Gardens.

I sometimes forget about the kind of natural beauty we have in London because my weekdays feel like they are predominantly filled with busy roads, car fumes, dodging strangers in the street and trying to keep myself warm in this yo-yo weather that England is known for having at random times of the year.

For me though, on this date, I felt happiness. I didn't know that it could be as simple as finding a location that I haven't stumbled across yet and being able to look up at the trees, stare at the fountain, admire the hustle and bustle of people and be reminded about why I love nature so much. If you don't know already, nature helped me and calmed me when nothing else could and I'll always be grateful for it, always.

I'm excited to see what new places I can find as I force myself to venture out more instead of staying cooped up indoors to eat my lunch. I mean don't get me wrong, sometimes it can be so nice to keep warm inside but you don't really get to see the world that way, right?


Friday 25 October 2019

Blogtober Day Nineteen
Hey lovelies!

So whether you're a major outfit planner or more of a last minute, slightly less organised individual you will be able to find 5 super easy, super simple Halloween looks in this post to try out this spooky season!

I really LOVE a bit of online shopping but what I love even more is finding a good deal on the items I want ASAP. Thankfully New Look are always bringing something new to the table and at very reasonable price too!

The 5 outfits that I have created down below may be a little superficial or not overly imaginative to some of you but I know that there are a lot of people out there who want a Halloween look that is completely fuss-free, easy to put together and very inexpensive.

If any of the above rings home with you then I hope you enjoy perusing the looks below and who knows, maybe you'll find your last minute Halloween costume for this year!

One important thing for me to add is: feel free to change things up! You can see from the images that I have incorporated a couple of options for the top half of the outfits and some others for the bottom half of the outfits because I know that not everybody will be into the same thing. I have tried to be as diverse with the looks as I can so with that said, let's get spooooooooky!


From Left: 1. Black Velvet Long Sleeve Jumpsuit, 2. Black Halloween Bat Cat Eye Sunglasses, 3. Black Bat Lace Halloween Mask, 4. Black Leather-Look Slim Block Court Heels.

From Top Left: 1. Brave Soul Bright Orange Halloween Creepin It Real Bodysuit, 2. Orange Glitter Pumpkin Bopper Halloween Headband, 3. Bright Orange Halloween Pumpkin Glitter Glasses, 4. Black Velvet Block Heel Sandals, 5. Black Leather-Look Mini Skirt.

From Left: 1. Black Halloween Skeleton Longline T-Shirt, 2. Black Halloween Skeleton Footless Tights, 3. Black Halloween Skeleton Knee High Socks, 4. Black Coated 'Life & Shape' Skinny Jeans, 5. Black Suedette Strappy Stiletto Heels, 6. Silver Halloween Jewel Face Gems.

From Top Left: 1. Black Lace Plunge Bodysuit, 2. Black Mesh Tutu Mini Skirt, 3. Black Notch Neck Strappy Bodysuit, 4. Black Spot Mesh Midi Skirt, 5. Silver Spider Web Halloween Hair Slides, 6. Black Glitter Platform Court Shoes.


Thursday 24 October 2019

Blogtober Day Eighteen
Hey lovelies!

I was scrolling through my Pinterest today and found that my 'Self Care' board had only one pin in it so I decided to do what any normal person would've done and hopped onto the 'More Ideas' option to start finding new inspiring images to add!

I don't know about you but I love self care days or self care sessions for that matter, if I'm not able to have a whole day of it, but there seems to be this unspoken notion that by indulging in self care you are being selfish. Personally this is an extreme way to look at it and yet it is a very real and very genuine emotion that we all experience from time to time as we struggle to balance our day-to-day life.

I have found that on the occasions where I have participated in some self care time for myself, I finish feeling as though I will face some negativity from others because my little ritual may have taken too long or just been planned for a bad time in the day. One important thing to know about me is that I am someone who hates to disappoint and it can always be a tough call for me if I want to spontaneously have some time to myself. I don't want and nor do I like to step on anyone's toes, even if I have this "oh well, I need to look after myself right now" kind of attitude.

So my question to you is: should we schedule our self care time in accordance with other people's days (specifically those that we live with) or does this defeat the whole point of SELF care? Just to clear things up, those that I live with have absolutely no problem with me looking after myself and this question is coming more from my own inner guilt rather than what others have to say. I can tell some of you may be reading this thinking, who cares what other people think, you do you and look after yourself! Yeah...I don't find it that easy haha!

In all honesty, I would love to be able to adopt various self care challenges over the next few months so that I can enhance my life but I am very aware of my need to look after others and to fit things around or in accordance with events that will be taking place in the near future. If you have any advice or some general words of wisdom, let me hear them in the comment section down below and I will be oh-so-grateful!


Wednesday 23 October 2019

Blogtober Day Seventeen
Hey lovelies!

Nude lipstick used to be this must-have product about a year ago but as time has progressed I have seen less and less of it on social media, in magazines and in makeup ads on TV. We are now spoilt for choice when it comes to lipsticks that challenge the lengths and depths of bold colour play and we are diverting at an ever exceeding pace towards the red lipstick.

Red lipstick has almost become a symbol. We are now powerhouses whenever we wear red on our lips, we are effortlessly chic, oh-so-put-together and all in all huge doting fans of this product in its varying hues. We draw on some eyeliner or put the most simple eyeshadow on our eyes and once upon a time a nude lipstick would've satisfied our craving for the "perfect makeup look", but it would seem that we are no longer appeased by lipstick on the other hand? Now that is something we may be onboard with!

You may have seen that in a few of my posts here and here, I am completely obsessed by the look that a red lip product gives me and for some reason I get so many more compliments when I feature it in a makeup look. I'm not sure if it's the bold shade of red or the fact that I don't wear it all that often but it certainly catches the eye of many admirers.

Now if you're sitting there thinking that you could never pull off red lipstick then I challenge you to take a step back, do a quick search of red lipsticks, find the right shade for you and try it on because you may surprise yourself. Personally I think that it's as easy as just finding the right shade for you because what suits one doesn't always suit another.

I think you'll find that the red lipstick is the equivalent of the nude lipstick in many respects and this is primarily due to the variety of shades on offer. A nude lipstick that is too light compared to your skin colour can give you the appearance of a lipless face but a nude lipstick too dark can make you look quite pale. Similarly, a red lipstick too light for your complexion can wash you out whilst a red lipstick too dark can make your features look harsher.

Nevertheless, before you run off to go buy your own perfect shade of red, be sure to leave me a comment down below letting me know if you think that the nude lipstick trend has died and if we have officially entered into a world where red lipstick will now rule all!


Tuesday 22 October 2019

Blogtober Day Sixteen
Hey lovelies!

I'm not entirely sure how this newfound love has come about but I'm really into it! I guess I've always admired the look of a pair of mum jeans, a simple white t-shirt and a relaxed-style blazer as a pretty cool outfit to wear. I've found that even in a work environment wearing smart black jeans, a white t-shirt and a casual black blazer over top is great way to mesh your own style with that of a more professional environment hence creating the slightly annoying term that is: smart casual.

Harper & Harley may have been the blog to officially set off this sudden appreciation for minimalism. I think I might have just fallen for what Sara Donaldson (H&H blogger) calls her "relaxed, chic black, white and grey philosophy". I found that with her oversized knits, statement shoes and cool classic vibes, you definitely cannot go wrong.

Oversized garments are not exactly my forte and with worries that they will make me look bigger, I do tend to go for more fitted items. What is my forte, however, is wearing black and what screams minimalism like an all black outfit! I just think that it is super flattering goes with EVERY colour so there's no chance of failure.

Sara Donaldson is my inspiration when it comes to wearing this trend, although for her it may be more of a religion or a way of life! In all seriousness though, her tips and tricks on how to style an outfit to create a look that is so effortlessly classy is why I have put all of my trust in her. I hope that I can master this style that is popping up everywhere and, you never know, there may be some minimalistic outfits making an appearance on my this space.

Be sure to let me know your thoughts on this style in the comment section down below, I'd love to hear what you have to say! Are you into the Minimalism trend or do you prefer something a little less neutral?


Monday 21 October 2019

Blogtober Day Fifteen
Hey lovelies!

I love creating these posts every season because not only are they extremely useful when I want to reminisce about the music I listened to 'back in the day', but they're also great at give you sweet people some inspiration when it comes to putting together some of your own much needed playlists!

So without further ado, here are 20 of my favourite songs this Autumn...

1. No Brainer - DJ Khaled featuring Justin Bieber, Chance The Rapper & Quavo
2. I'm The One - DJ Khaled featuring Justin Bieber, Chance The Rapper, Quavo & Lil Wayne
3. 10,000 Hours - Dan + Shay & Justin Bieber
4. Work - Kane Brown
5. One With The Wind - GentleBeatz
6. Spooky Scary Skeletons - TrapCity (Trap Remix)
7. The Git Up - Blanco Brown
8. One Number Away - Luke Combs
9. There For You - Martin Garrix & Troye Sivan
10. Expectations - Lauren Jauregui
11. Strike A Pose - Young T & Bugsey featuring Aitch
12. Good As You - Kane Brown
13. God's Country - Blake Shelton
14. Love Me Like You Mean It - Kelsea Ballerini
15. One Thing Right - Marshmello & Kane Brown
16. Not 20 Anymore - Bebe Rexha
17. Weekend - Kane Brown
18. Miss Me More - Kelsea Ballerini
19. Motivation - Normani
20. Mother's Daughter - Miley Cyrus

If you've been following me for a while then you will know that music is quite literally my world and my soul and I don't know what I would do without it. I guess these posts are a little therapeutic for me in a way because these songs can make me feel better and can make me feel less alone if I'm in a particuarly sad, in my feels kind of mood haha! Be sure to leave me some suggestions down below because I'm always looking for good music to add to my list!


Friday 18 October 2019

Blogtober Day Fourteen
Hey lovelies!

What would you do if you could be the person that you've always wanted to be? Would you shout from the top of the mountain? Would you stop worrying and feeling immense anxiety about not being good enough? Would everything be magically fixed?

I guess we never really know the answers to these questions until it becomes our reality but I often wonder, will that ever happen? Will we ever be truly happy once we reach that goal or that idea of who we dream of being or will we always want more and never be happy? There's always that risk.

The thought of not feeling good enough is one that affects us all at one point or another and it hurts, it truly hurts. Your brain has a way of tricking you into thinking that you are less than you actually are, that what you amount to is less than the girl/guy sitting next to you on the train or the girl/guy that you chat to at work.

Everyone is somehow prettier than you, more intelligent, funnier, the best person in the room or the most popular, and what are you I hear you ask yourself...not any of things...or so you think.

The overused, total cliche of a solution? You need to love yourself for who you are even though it feels like the hardest thing to do on the planet. You're not going to love EVERY part of you but you are going to find ways to forgive your 'flaws' simply because you have so many amazing things to offer in this world. Your potential is never-ending, your worth is invaluable, and your beauty both inside and out is exquisite. Remember, there's nobody like you so take comfort in that fact and treasure it!

I have heard myself ask those "am I good enough?" questions a lot lately and it may be due to a change of environment but it's still not a good reason to silently beat myself up about the fact that I'm not who I think everyone wants me to be. The important thing for you and I to know is that we are good enough no matter what others say, no matter what the insecure side of our brain says, no matter how much we keep telling ourselves otherwise. We ARE enough.


Thursday 17 October 2019

Blogtober Day Thirteen
Hey lovelies!

Gaming. Boy does it take over your world once you get into! I mean, as much as I'd like to say that I'm ace at playing Fortnite, I'm the best at Grand Theft Auto, I'm the fastest on Need for Speed and I'm the greatest trader on FIFA, the reality of it is I struggle. I don't really know why I've never gotten the hang of playing games like these but I know for a fact that it's not for a want of trying, I just need hours and hours of practice haha!

I've discovered though that I love a game especially when it's portable, I can play it on the go, I can use it without Wifi or data, and it is fun or entertaining in some way. Mobile phone games  for those reasons are always a must for me.  

Personally amongst all the social media accounts, the endless apps and the resources that I need for adulting, I want a bit of a breather and to have something that can either train my brain or let it rest for a little while so I don't have to think too much.

So if you're wondering what kind of games I'm playing at the moment then just keep reading...

1. Homescapes - You may have already seen this advertised absolutely everywhere by now but I downloaded this game over a year and a half ago and I have managed to get way over level 600 and I'm majorly proud of that! If you love Candy Crush, this is super similar but with a little extra twist/quirk.

2. Colour Bump 3D - I have to say that a lot of these 3D games from the Good Job Games family are so freaking cool to play and very addictive too! I love playing this one when I'm on the train and need a distraction whilst I wait for my stop.

3. Idle Supermarket - This is for sure another game company (CodiGames) that have created very similar but equally cool games for you to play. I'm not going to lie but I sure do get a little obsessed with the constant growth of my supermarket in this game - I love hitting the targets!

4. Klondike Adventures - Such a cute game with its hard working village and real time challenges, I don't think that I could ever get bored of this one. I adore being able to find new treasures and constantly engage with the ever-growing, adaptive storyline.

5. Zipline Valley - Last but not least we've got this thought provoking and mental challenging game. I think it's pretty cool how you're tested on every level to try to get the little characters all the way home on this zipline, safe and sound, whilst trying to dodge all the obstacles. You need to try it out!

...and there we have it! If you have any suggestions or recommendations for other games I should play then send them my way by leaving a comment in the section down below!


Wednesday 16 October 2019

Blogtober Day Twelve
Hey lovelies!

I always feel that around this time of year I become a real foodie. I don't know if it's the colder weather or the fact that I'm someone who has always craved carbs but I just LOVE dough in all its forms - dough turned into bread, dough turned into garlic bread, dough turned into pizza - you name it, I love it! Unfortunately or maybe fortunately...the cravings don't stop there because I am a sucker for chocolate, specifically chocolate brownies and I'm telling you from now, if I could go around taste-testing every chocolate brownie in every restaurant that served it for dessert then I would be a pretty happy gal! No lie.

I recently had an awesome day out with a loved one where we enjoyed a movie at the cinema and a three course meal at Zizzi and I couldn't believe just how much I would enjoy my garlic bread with mozzarella and caramelised onions. I liked it, A LOT, and not from the point of view that it just tasted great but it made my soul happy and it made my heart sing, it was THAT good.

In case you're wondering, yes I am one of those people that like to take photos of their food before they eat it which can of course annoy those around me but hey, at least I get to remember my food for years to come and have the opportunity to think: "wasn't that a darn good plate of dough balls!" No regrets for me. None. Nada.

I think that it's important to note though that Mediterranean girls like me...scrap that...Greek girls like me love to eat, at least the ones I know do! Similarly just like Italians or the Spanish, our food tends to be quite heavy, quite filling and oh so tasty which can often make it difficult to say no to another plate of dolmades, Greek bread and/or feta cheese - the latter of which are just two of my ultimate weaknesses amongst a whole selection of other delicious treats.

So for this season I'll continue to be a foodie but I'll actually start to look after myself a bit more because all play (food) and no work (exercise) can lead to a very unhealthy lifestyle and I don't want to continue on that road if I can help it. I'm pretty sure that is what often turns my life into a mini self esteem disaster, which is something that I certainly do not need. 

In the meantime, whilst I venture down that road to becoming a healthier version of myself, be sure to let me know a bit more about you and your love for food. If you're a foodie, how do you balance your cravings and your love for food in order to have a healthy lifestyle? Give me some tips and let's chat!


Tuesday 15 October 2019

Blogtober Day Eleven
Hey lovelies!

"If music be the food of love, play on" - I must admit, Shakespeare was a wise man. My love for music is not a recent obsession, but more so a constant need to thrive, to feel the emotions and have the desire to live out those emotions through every beat and every word sung. I have a deep connection with music and whilst I understand that for some, listening to dance music doesn't necessarily soothe you or allow you to be in the moment, there are so many different genres that can make you feel some type of way whatever your mood and whatever your taste.

Music features a never-ending spectrum of moods, minds, and magic and without it I would be a little more lost than I let on. There's something about going down the escalators on the Underground, looking around whilst everybody goes on with their lives and you're standing there with Old Town Road acting as the soundtrack to that particular moment. I like to compare it to those adverts you get in the cinema that showcase how seeing a movie in the cinema is a sure fire way of being able to feel as if you're in every single scene. Well sure enough that's what music is to me. Every song, every beat, every note and every lyric pretty much. It feeds my emotions and it feeds my soul in ways that nothing else can.

I can't figure out how they do it but musicians are somehow so much better at being able to put a mood or an emotion into words and have it make sense; hallelujah for their talent! Without them I sure wouldn't be able to have a dance party in my house that gives me such overwhelming happiness...or sadness (depending on the song) compared to if I were to dance in silence. It makes life interesting and it makes you remember things.

Music to me is like your favourite perfume in the sense that it can bring back memories, it can remind people of you and it can make any and every situation that much sweeter, maybe even bittersweet. I have never-ending videos of me singing along or miming to my favourite songs and I could very easily spend most of my time making these videos and pretending I'm much cooler than I actually am!

I mean let's be honest, who doesn't imagine that they're performing at their own concert in front of thousands of their adoring fans or making their own music video because I sure do! I may actually be alone in my room but my soul is in the moment, creating my own cheesy magic through my own little recreations - I promise you it is normal and not at all sad haha!

To be on the safe side though, leave me a comment down below letting me know that I'm not alone in this! In all honesty, even if you all find me a little weird, I really don't mind because in those moments when I'm in my music bubble listening to every song loud and proud, I am at my happiest! 


Monday 14 October 2019

Blogtober Day Ten
Hey lovelies!

This post is a big one to the extent that I could potentially be opening up a can of worms or maybe revealing something that other people can't see but nevertheless I feel it. I once saw this quote that said: "You are so used to your features, you don't know how beautiful you look to a stranger" and it got me thinking about how harsh we can be about ourselves and the way we look. I have spent years beating myself up about the fact that I have always been a little bigger than the girls I know or the other women I pass in the street and it always sticks at the back of my mind, bugging me every now and again.

You see I am a very observant person which can be great in crucial moments but when you're constantly observing other people and looking at what beautiful features they have and that you don't, it can be a little soul crushing to say the least. I try to do it less and less but when you're on the train and there's nothing else to do but people watch, there's hardly time to escape it!

Bringing your attention back to the original idea behind this post though, some of you may be looking at the title thinking: "maybe beauty is just your blogging area of expertise" but the truth is the reason why my blog seems to showcase more beauty than fashion lately is because I'm just not ready. I truly do not feel that I am in the best physical shape of my life and whilst I'm not asking to have a model figure so that I can feel comfortable creating fashion content, I am wanting to become healthier in order to see mental and physical results that I would be proud to show off.

Personally I don't believe that my body aspirations are linked to any societal norms because firstly I do not agree with them all, nor do I fit in with most of these traditional societal norms and nor do I want to in all honesty. I truly appreciate my body and what it has to offer but when I find myself wanting to shoot outfit photos or do anything fashion related, I end up having THOSE thoughts.

THOSE thoughts being the ones where you doubt your potential and the ones that leave you questioning all that you are - they can be so utterly detrimental to the point where they have the power to put me off from doing something that I could really enjoy! I think that it's fair to say that this feeling is very common in so many individuals and that's a sad fact of life because no one wants to feel less than they actually are. Most of all though, no one wants to feel as though they need to overcompensate or overshadow their "flaws" by showcasing one feature of theirs (e.g. their face) in photos in order to divert away from what they don't like about themself (e.g. their body) but then again, it's all about what you're comfortable with I guess.

Maybe in the near future I will be able to muster up the courage to create fashion content but in the meantime, I would love if you could let me know in the comment section down below if that is something that you would like to see from me! What do you prefer: wishlists or actual photos of me wearing the clothes rather than just photos of the items? Let's get chatting, I want to hear your thoughts! 


Friday 11 October 2019

Blogtober Day Nine
Hey lovelies!

You may have seen the above tweet recently and long story short, I'm just really proud of myself and how far I've come. I'm not one to boast, nor am I one to push my achievements in other people's faces. I keep myself to myself but when I put this tweet up, I just felt like I had to get it out there.

I know I said that there was no rhyme or reason as to why I was proud but the truth is, I have managed to take a step back to look at my life. I can see what I once was and I can see what I am now - bigger, better and stronger. I'm not perfect by any means but I'm finally getting more in tune with life and I'm pretty darn happy about it!

Let me know in the comment section down below if you've seen an improvement in yourself. Are you feeling happy and proud of who you've become? I want to know more about you!


Thursday 10 October 2019

Blogtober Day Eight
Hey lovelies!

Happy World Mental Health Day to all of you!

Today's post is a little simpler than the others in terms of its structure but its content is quite deep, raw and very vulnerable. I don't always like to delve into these feelings too much in such a public space because it can be a cruel world out there and there are plenty of harsh individuals who like to have their say and tell you how you should be feeling.

I wrote the below piece because I wanted to express how I felt during a time in my life where everything felt as though it was going wrong, completely and utterly wrong. I was lost, truly lost and although I have managed to find my way out of the deepest depths of my mind and soul, I know that I am still finding my way out and I always will be - we're always a constant work in progress, always changing and always learning.

I know it's cliche but if one of you reads this and can relate to what I have to say or if it helps one of you to know that things will get better then I can consider my job done. I love you all and I want to help with all my heart.

So please, take a read...

Silence. I need it now and again, just to figure out how this stickiness ends,
Sometimes it's with a hug from my love, other times it's not so fun,
A talking to and a bringing back down to earth chat does the trick, but even so it never ever chooses to stick,
My life splits into a million pieces and once upon a time there lay this perfect fit yet here I sit, on the floor shoving the pieces back together,
With tears in my eyes and a dent in my soul, everything feels so out of my control,
A nervous heart and an anxious mind is all it takes for me to unwind and yet I unravel into this utter mess and wind up one big ball of uncontrollable stress,
I apologise for the inconvenience I cause but after a moment I find myself pause,
I'm no longer in charge of my behaviour, you tell me to stop like I'm doing you a favour,
I can't help the way I am so help me God, I don't understand what I've done so wrong,
I turn on myself and shout back with anger, whilst my reflection looks back at me with such candour,
The person in the mirror is no use to me, it mimics every word that it ever did see,
A slow chipping away of me as a human, I want to get away so that I can move on,
I hold myself together with some old tape, until I feel so bent out of shape,
I barely hold on to reality, I don't remember what that used to be,
But with time I find the dust settles, and you're no longer in a bush of nettles,
You build up who you used to be, something you once knew as 'happy',
Don't give up because it does get better, get back what was yours like a debt collector,
The silence becomes that less bit scary, and the darkness affects you what I know as 'rarely'.



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